Episode [363] - Historical Figures on Instagram - November 30, 2023

credit: AdSpare2727

The episode that loves you, could kiss you

Participants

Ian Karmel: His bar mitzvah was not a Hand Job City, it was a Magic the Gathering

Sean Jordan: Laura and Max left town and he got pinkeye, or vice versa

David Gborie: The guy figuring it out

Blair Socci: Is having 90s Diet Hot Mom Stockholm Syndrome

  

Serpentine Explanation

When your dog is in the backyard sniffing around for a place to poop. 

Draft Order

Sean Jordan - natural victory, scissors against two papers

Sean Jordan sets the draft order as:

Sean

Blair

David

Ian 

Round 1

Pick 1.1 | Sean Jordan | The Colosseum 

Pick 1.2 | Blair Socci | Napoleon Bonaparte

Pick 1.3 | David Gborie | Jesus 

Pick 1.4 | Ian Karmel | Mansa Musa 

Round 2

Pick 2.1 | Ian Karmel with an on-mic assist from Dana Schwartz | Marie Antoinette

Pick 2.2 | David Gborie | Grigori Rasputin

Pick 2.3 | Blair Socci | Anne Boleyn 

Pick 2.4 | Sean Jordan | Doc Holliday (Ian: “We need to get you some new guys”)

Round 3

Pick 3.1 | Sean Jordan | Marilyn Monroe 

Pick 3.2 | Blair Socci | Andre the Giant 

Pick 3.3 | David Gborie | Benjamin Franklin 

Pick 3.4 | Ian Karmel | George Herman “Babe” Ruth 

Round 4

Pick 4.1 | Ian Karmel | King Ludwig II of Bavaria, “The Swan King”  

Pick 4.2 | David Gborie | Jackie “Moms” Mabley

Pick 4.3 | Blair Socci | Pocahontas 

Pick 4.4 | Sean Jordan | Leonardo da Vinci 

Round 5

Pick 5.1 | Sean Jordan | Al Capone 

Pick 5.2 | Blair Socci | Albert Einstein 

Pick 5.3 | David Gborie | Siddhartha Gautama aka the Buddha 

Pick 5.4 | Ian Karmel | Jack Johnson, the "Galveston Giant"

Producer’s Pick 

Isaac K. “RLPD” Lee | William Shakespeare 

Honorable Mentions

Lord Byron, Zelda Fitzgerald, Michelangelo, Emily Dickinson, Sylvia Plath, Hilda Doolittle, Howard Huges, Marquis de Sade, Blackbeard, Tupac Shakur

Quotes From This Episode

“That’s a Big Dog guarantee.” -David Gborie

“Pussy doesn’t come out of red leather, I’ll tell you that” - Blair Socci

“I always wanted to be in that room.” -Sean Jordan / “Well why don’t you draft the room next?” -Ian Karmel

“He was a little mad, Bavari interesting.” -Sean Jordan

“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity. And I’m not sure about the universe, so use a rubber LOL.” -Blair Socci

Notable Show Canon Events

Blair names Isaac the “Red Leather Pussy Destroyer” [1:16:54] after hearing about his new Alfa Romeo. 

First (or second?) show reference to Shane Torres accidentally publishing all of his Twitter drafts at once